Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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