her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize