my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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