nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Houston, we have a blender
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
