No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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