i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize
