you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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