it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize