Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen

  (703): View more from Virginia

  i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid

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  (540): that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen (703): i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid http://tfl.nu/ez4n
  Replies (8) Good night (1386) Bad night (654)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.

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  (702): yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark. http://tfl.nu/ahfc
  Replies (12) Good night (2037) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me

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  (201): I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me http://tfl.nu/61f7
  Replies (24) Good night (683) Bad night (6366)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious

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  (925): so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious http://tfl.nu/hqe9
  Replies (16) Good night (4642) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.

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  (214): Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me. http://tfl.nu/94g1
  Replies (9) Good night (662) Bad night (3175)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??

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  (732): Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen?? http://tfl.nu/vnhk
  Replies (14) Good night (4481) Bad night (1396)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life

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  (862): i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life http://tfl.nu/57hm
  Replies (52) Good night (1038) Bad night (6974)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers

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  (615): i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers http://tfl.nu/7wrv
  Replies (5) Good night (3081) Bad night (772)
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  (925): View more from California

  WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.

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  (925): WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES. http://tfl.nu/71kq
  Replies (8) Good night (764) Bad night (1601)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.

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  (815): I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost. http://tfl.nu/ucyv
  Replies (7) Good night (1962) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs

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  (970): Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs http://tfl.nu/ag8n
  Replies (6) Good night (807) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.

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  (414): They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe. http://tfl.nu/qow6
  Replies (3) Good night (334) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch

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  (562): So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch http://tfl.nu/gm5w
  Replies (8) Good night (741) Bad night (256)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back

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  (903): Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back http://tfl.nu/kstn
  Replies (3) Good night (473) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.

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  (+44): Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room. http://tfl.nu/dcq0
  Replies (2) Good night (618) Bad night (178)

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