please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
