is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
