His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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