I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
