I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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