I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Too much gin, very little bucket
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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