I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Omg I joined a choir last night...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
