so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
