You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
