i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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