There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Dignity is for republicans.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
