life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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