You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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