I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
