I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize