I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
im holly from the hills drunk
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
