you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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