everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
