He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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