I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
People in love make me want to vomit
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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