Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize
