Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
