walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
