If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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