why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I am naked and annoyed.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
