oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize