Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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