Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
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I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
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I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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