Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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