Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
