and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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