Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
