Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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