not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
