only if we run a train.
done.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
