This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
