A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"