I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
