I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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