How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize