well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize