i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
